California Dreamin’ Come True

I am still basking in the afterglow of two weeks spent with my sister, Joanie, and her family in California.  As a 50th birthday present, they sent me an airline ticket to come out for a visit.  Once I arrived, they proceeded to treat me like a Queen and it never stopped during my entire visit!

The timing was perfect!  I was spiraling down into old patterns/beliefs including “I’m in it alone” accompanied by “the sky is falling” and “ducks in a row syndrome.”  Sound familiar?  I’m sure you have your own patterns/beliefs that pop up when you’re vulnerable.  For me it’s a cumulative process.  A bit of residue gets stuck to my spirit each time I go through a challenging patch of life.  I’m typically able to notice it and clear it out before it builds up too much.  If I’m especially busy and not paying attention, I can find myself teetering dangerously between slowing down and plain old stuck.

Emerging from another New England winter with the promise of spring on the horizon, a change of scenery was the perfect remedy.  Although I knew it was just want I needed, my saboteur put up a good internal struggle.  I had many moments of “the timing couldn’t be worse” and “I couldn’t possibly leave now.”  In those moments, I heeded my own advice and remembered the world will keep spinning.

A nano-second after planting my feet firmly on California soil and receiving a very satisfying hug from my sister, I surrendered.  I was no longer a wife, daughter, caregiver, coach, Board member, etc.  I was just me . . . Kathie . . . nestled in a cozy, safe, nurturing nest.  My sister and I have “done our work” through the years to enable us to move past who we were and meet each other where we are in each moment (which is a journey and gift worthy of writing about in the future).

During my visit, we filled our days with activities based upon our intention of keeping most of them simple, free/low-cost and meaningful.  Honestly, the most memorable moments were indeed the simplest:  playing table hockey with my sister and laughing so hard we were crying, lingering at the dinner table and sharing family stories with my brother-in-law Dave and nieces, Caroline and Lizzy in the glow of the candlelight, walking in the mornings with my sister, having Caroline drive me for the first time now that she has her license, pubbing with Lizzy, etc.

They were aware I had created an “always wanted to do” list prior to my trip, so they lined up some activities to support me in checking off a few while I was there:

• Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge (#3): On a truly magnificent Friday, my sister and I drove to the bridge and parked on the Sausalito side.  We walked toward the San Fran side and then back.  I am not crazy about heights, so I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to do it.  Well, we did it alright!  We chatted while walking, stopped to enjoy the view, looked over the side!, took pictures and walked 3.5 miles in the process.  I will never be able to look at the GGB again without remembering that special day spent with my sister.

• Learn how to shoot a bow and arrow (#4): This one surprised even me when I made my list.  I have no idea when/where I picked this one up, however I knew I just had to learn how to do it.  As luck would have it my brother-in-law, Dave, is an avid sportsman.  So, he set up a target, pulled out the beginner’s bow and arrow set the girls use, and took it upon himself to teach me.  After many less than stellar attempts (including arrows bouncing off the wall sideways rather than inserting themselves into the target) and conversations (what are you aiming at? are both eyes open? tilt the bow a bit!, keep you left arm out of the way!, etc.), I eventually honed in on the target and actually hit the bulls’ eye.  I promptly put down the equipment, took a picture, and went in to celebrate with a glass of wine.  No need to pressure myself to recreate perfection.  Truth be told, I was probably 10 feet away from it, but you’ve got to start somewhere.  Now that I have muscle memory, I am hopeful it will be easier to replicate in the future.

• Attend a professional hockey game (#5): The Olympics hooked me!  Fortunately for me, Joanie and Dave are rabid San Jose Shark fans.  They actually planned my trip around when the Sharks would be in town.  We followed their pre-game tradition and enjoyed a meal at Teske’s then headed off to see the Sharks!  I was delighted by the experience.  Adorable and atheletic young men fearlessly dart around an ice rink in an attempt to score a goal . . . at which point the crowd goes wild and a shark dangling overhead comes to life.  I am happy to say they won after a losing streak.  I, of course, attributed it to me being there and having painted my toenails teal earlier in the day (see below).

• Get a pedicure (#6): I’ve never indulged in this one.  I’ve always been curious, but it’s too easy to do it myself for free!!  Then I recently saw a women I know through a professional organization getting one at the local salon.  She had such a blissful look on her face, and I instantly knew I had to experience it for myself.  There’s a fabulous nail salon in my sister’s town so off went.  Seated side-by-side in magical chairs (heat, vibrate, rollers, cup holders, etc.), she treated me to the experience.  Ignorance was bliss.  Professional pedicures are definitely in my future.  It’s a mini-vacation and stress reducer that really is worth the cost.  I’ll spare you the picture I took of my toes to commemorate another first!

I could go on and on (“Peanut Butter” the well-behaved Chihuahua/Pug mix on my flight, the boisterous frog in my sister’s backyard, “Tootsie” the delightful French Bulldog who visited us outside Blush yogurt [delicious!!!],  the train whistle in the distance I can hear from her house, the fabulous dinners Dave cooked, a road trip to Santa Barbara with Joanie), however the world awaits us both.  I’ll close by admitting I briefly contemplated staying in CA forever.  Can you blame me?  It was wonderful being pampered.  I returned home refreshed and residue free and am happily back in the groove here in CT.

Whether it’s a real vacation or a mini one, look for opportunities to shake the residue off your spirit.  Who loves you enough to create a cozy, safe, nurturing nest just when you need it the most?  When you get the invitation, don’t hesitate to receive, surrender and enjoy!

Are you ready to thrive?

Kathie Nitz

P.S. I’ve checked off 6 of my “always wanted to do” list . . . only 44 more to go!